I feel shaky and not great, but I'm not hungover and I went to bed and woke up sober.
That's a win win.
Today, I have to go grocery shopping and to Costco. That will be a trigger I'm sure, but at least where I live, the grocery store I shop in does not sell alcohol of any kind. Costco does, but I rarely bought any there because my partner and I usually shop together. Fortunately, he doesn't drink much at all.
In the past, I would only carry cash when I went shopping in order to keep myself from buying alcohol.
Another trick I will do is not bring any money, debit or credit cards with me when I leave the house to go to the gym or to do other things that don't require money. I have such a habit of "rewarding" myself after swimming by stopping at the liquor store.
I started to get hung up on my work situation this morning, but stopped myself. Right now, for the next several weeks, not only do I have the TIME to get sober (which is probably good and bad) but I have to do this. If I don't get sober, then my work situation will not work out anyway. So, for now, I have a lot of time on my hands. Since I drink alone this is also very hard for me, but it's NEVER going to get any easier. I might as well do it NOW.
Not to mention, I am falling apart physically and emotionally. I feel 100% out of control of myself.
I'm drinking coffee on an empty stomach (which I like to do too) and have already started to obsess about alcohol. Then I remembered that I need to eat breakfast and most likely, I will feel better. So I am going to go make breakfast.
GM...ok...you need to fill your time up with something constructive! What if you gavr yourself a challenge? Maybe a walking challenge? Make a goal that goes beyond what you think is good! Make your goal about miles, time, steps, whatever. They say we should have 10,000 steps per day...equivalent of 5 miles. Aim for 12,500 steps per day for a week and then up it! Maybe your goal will be more....maybe your goal will be less! You wrote that you swim. Maybe challenge yourself with that! Obsess in something physical! It will release good endorphins, it will lower your blood pressure,you will get healthier, you will lose weight...and more importantly...you will have less time to drink!!! Xo
ReplyDeleteYeah.. physical exercise has always been the way I have quit. It is great medicine. Swimming is my meditation.. I'm leaving now actually to go swim. This time of day, there's hardly anyone in the pool, which I love.
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