Day 6

Yep, I went back.

I'm glad I did, because it has led me to a new path of recovery.

I think getting the liver panel results and then being told that it's not a big deal or serious by the doctor gave me permission to drink.

So much has happened in the past month in some ways, but so little has happened in other way.

I won't bore you with the details of the drinking. Same old shit, different day, although my tolerance increased even more. I'm glad I had the sense not to buy full bottles of vodka, because there's a good chance I would have drank myself to death. Those little nips probably saved my life.

I stopped going to my outpatient program. I'm probably going to go back, but I'm not quite sure. I may be starting a job and I need to see if I can do half days at the program.

I had found an amazing counselor. I have also found a new primary care doctor in a community health center that really really understands addiction.

.. and I have starting taking Naltrexone. It's a game changer. I can't believe how different I feel. My obsessive thoughts, cravings, and anxiety is almost completely gone and today is day 4 of the drug.

Sober at 53 reached out to me and told me about this amazing recovery group on Facebook, and I have joined, and it's the fucking bomb. The people are so supportive and I feel like I have a safe place to go at all time.